Monthly Archives: February 2011

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Music… Welcome to the world of the weird.

Music…
Funny thing, music…
It’s crazy that you can go from listening to hardcore rock to gospel music in 0.5 seconds. How you can put two CDs next to each other, and say, “Hey, these are both music CDs,” and yet they’re so completely different you can love one, and hate the other.
But if you’re anything like me, that can happen with two different songs from the same album.
So what makes some people like Pop, and others like Opera?  And is it possible for one person to like two genres so different they might as well come from two different solar systems?
We’ll see won’t we?
Ch@os :)

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Boys… Pay attention.

When she walks away from you mad, follow her
When she stare’s at your mouth, Kiss her
When she pushes you or hit’s you, Grab her and dont let go
When she start’s cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she’s quiet, Ask her what’s wrong
When she ignore’s you, Give her your attention
When she pull’s away, Pull her back
When you see her at her worst, Tell her she’s beautiful
When you see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word
When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she’s scared, Protect her
When she lay’s her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steal’s your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she tease’s you, Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesnt answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay
When she look’s at you with doubt, Back yourself up
When she say’s that she like’s you, she really does more than you could understand
When she grab’s at your hands, Hold her’s and play with her fingers
When she bump’s into you, bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tell’s you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes, don’t look away until she does
When she misses you, she’s hurting inside
When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away
When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
When she’s mad hug her tight and don’t let go
When she says she’s ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she’ll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat her like she’s all that matters to you.
Tease her and let her tease you back
Stay up all night with her when she’s sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she’s bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she’s important
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
“Who’s ass am I kicking babe?”
And when she’s happy, don’t ask her why. It’ll be you.
~Author Unknown

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JOke… Funny :D

There are 3 men who need to get across a lake
The 1st one prays asking for the strength to get across
He gets big muscles and swims across
But almost dies 5 times
The 2nd 1 prays for the strength and the tools he needs to get across
He gets his big muscles and boat and rows across
But he almost dies 3 times
The 3rd 1 prays, for the strength, tools, and the brains
He turns into a woman
Walks 4 yards
And crosses the bridge

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**While The World Is Crashing Down** [ Part 1 ] ^^I’ll Teach You to Fly On Hidden Wings…^^

© Jessica Swinburne 2011

[{ Part 1 }]

Rain.
I never really liked the rain. It’s wet and cold and generally uncomfortable to be in.
I had always loved the sun. The feel of it on my skin… The heat…
And yet there was always something about the rain that intrigued me. It was strange, and the only part of me I had ever suppressed. Put down, ignored. Like I was afraid… It confused me, so I simply ignored it. And life went on.

:) :) :) :) :)

I stared out the class room window, wishing for the sun, and seeing nothing but cloud, gloom and rain. Joy.
Two weeks to holidays and they still expected us to work. They never learn. We never worked after exams, why should it be different this term? Exams were over, marks were being calculated and the teachers had better things to do than baby sit us, and yet, we were being forced to listen to the constant droning of our History teacher.
Spare me. I honestly don’t know why we even had to take History; it was just a waste of time. I don’t know why they didn’t just leave the past, in the past.
I certainly didn’t want to know about how the English revolutionized the world 200 years ago. And it didn’t look like any of my class mates did either.
At least it was almost over… but it was only first period. Could I really take 5 and a half more hours of this? I really hoped I didn’t die of boredom.
Just then our vice principle strolled in like he owned the place to have a nice little chat with our teacher. Hey, I wasn’t complaining, at least I didn’t have to listen.
After they had spoken for a few minutes the vice beckoned someone to enter the room. He was all floppy hair and long legs… haha sounds kind of like a girl… except he defiantly wasn’t.
He was tall, probably about 6 ft. 1, had straight dark brown, like really dark, hair, and the greenest eyes you’ve ever seen. I noticed that his right ear was pierced. He scanned the room, while walking to the front, like he was daring us to judge him.
Well I certainly wasn’t, it was his life, his body, and his hair and he could do whatever he wanted with it.
He shook hands with the teacher once he reached him, obviously introducing himself.
“Class, this is Rain, he’s new to the school, but he’s in my next class, so-” Just then the bell went, silencing him, and the whole class scattered in about 0.5 seconds.
Due to my seating arrangements, past the teacher was the easiest way out the room. So I walked slowly as to avoid having to wait to get out the door, no use rushing if you can’t actually get out right?
“Oh, Ariah,” my teacher called as I was walking past, forcing me to turn and look at them, “Please remember that your extra credit essay is due tomorrow.”
“Sure Sir,” I even managed to smile at him, even though he was one of the few teachers I didn’t like. “You’ll have it first thing.”
I just had to write it first. It didn’t help that I needed all the extra credit I could get in that particular subject.
When I finally made it out the door, I got attacked by my friend, Cya, as was our normal morning greeting, whenever we saw each other first in the morning. Now, today because she was wrapped around her latest beau this morning and all I saw of her was her back.
“Nice to see you too, after seeing you play tonsil hockey with what’s-his-name this morning.” I grinned lazily at her, just asking for a smart retort.
“Not my fault he’s better at kissing then you are at remembering names.” She complemented this with a sweet, innocent smile, as we started walking slowly to our next class, which we shared.
“The rate you go through boyfriends, I’m glad my memory doesn’t having enough space to keep up.”
We smiled at each other and linked arms for the remainder of our walk.
Although my next two classes were more interesting normally, but just couldn’t pull my attention so late in the term. This was why by the time we got to our usual break spot and sat down next to my friend Seth, I was so half asleep that I didn’t even notice the apparently newest addition to our group.
“Hey sleepy head, have fun in History?” Seth teased me, and then opened his arms for a hug. I gladly obliged.
“Haha, yes because History is just so enthralling.”
“Because you looked so attentive in History.”
Then I noticed him. His intense light green eyes laughing while his mouth only showed a slow quirk of the one side. I could see more of him closer up.
He had the thickest, darkest eye-lashes I’d ever seen, which I’m pretty sure were wasted on a guy, and was somewhere between tanned, and pale. He was wearing all black, but despite this and his appearance in general, he didn’t seem to give off the vibes normally attributed to Goths or Emos.
Also no tattoos. Well, that I could see at least.
“Sarcasm and the ability to sense it are virtues around here.” I threw back.
“Who said I wasn’t being sarcastic too?” His tone screamed challenge, but instead of humouring him, I simply gave him a really slow, really sleepy smile and turned to Seth.
But alas, Cya’s just too curious for her own good, and asked a good 3 seconds later, “Who’s our new friend Seth?”
“Girls, this is Rain, Rain, this Ariah, who you have to call Ri and Cya.”
“Nice to meet you, Rain,” Cya gashed and went over to sit next to him.
One of my eye-brows went up, a question I knew Seth would understand.
“He’s new.”
“Obviously.”
“Be nice.”
Up went the other eye-brow.
“Don’t give me that look, I know you.”
Grin.
“Will you be good, for me?”
Angelic look.
“Ri, seriously.”
I laughed, “Of course, you know I’d do anything for you.”
“Thata girl,” He smile and winked at me then turned to the recklessly flirting Cya and the not really flirting at all Rain. I smiled at the sight. A guy, not going for Cya? Miracle.
Tuning out all the noise, I put my head on Seth’s shoulder and closed my eyes.
But sleep was elusive at the best of times for me, never mind on my best friends shoulder.
“Ri, earth to Ri!” I could just imagine Cya waving her hand in front of my face. I opened my eyes and there she was, sure enough, waving her hand just in front of my face.
“Yes, almighty Cya, what can I do for you?”
“You can be sociable! Like you get when you’re happy, or we feed you too much sugar!” She grinned and pulled her tongue at me, so then, obviously, I had to pull mine back at her, show casing my tongue stud.
“Ariah Nyx! Put that away!” And my Head-Of-Grade had to choose that moment to walk past. Lovely. “If I see that thing once more, I’ll make sure it’s taken out. Am I understood?”
“Yes, Miss.” I tried to say it meekly, but it’s hard to be meek when you’re trying not to laugh.
She walked off in a huff, clearly going to have a worse day for having seen my tongue, and its stud.
“Damn she needs to get laid.” Cya said, using her best gangster voice.
“And you need to stop getting laid.” My oh-so sweet smile totally contradicting my words.
“Or maybe you need to get some too, little Miss Virgin.”
“Better virgin then slut ange.”
“Ladies.” Seth, being older than us, liked to pretend he could defuse pretend hostile situations.
I grinned at Seth and that was the end of it.
The bell went, and my day went on. At the end of it, I walked out to my motorbike, which was parked between Cya’s and Seth’s cars.
Cya and Seth were there waiting for me, so we could all go to one of our houses. While I was still walking towards them, I saw them call Rain over.
When I got close enough to hear them talk, I slowed to listen to their conversation.
“You don’t have a car or anything?” I heard Cya ask, Rain I was assuming.
“Nope, I don’t live too far away though, and plus I like walking, it’s good for me.” This was confirmed when he replied.
“Well, if you ever decide you don’t like walking, one of us will always give you a ride,” Seth came into it.
“Are you going straight home now?” Cya always did ask the most random questions.
“Na, I think I wander around town for a bit.” Weird… there’s nothing to do in our town, not in walking distance of the school at least.
“Well, if you want to blow that off, you can come with us to one of our places.” I said as I came close enough to be in the conversation. I was pretty sure ‘wander around town’ really meant he just didn’t want to go home.
He raised his eye-brows so they disappeared into his dark fringe. “Really?”
“Yeah, sure,” Seth dropped in, knowing that I had been genuine.
“Okay, that’d be good, thanks… Ariah.” He seems to struggle with my name, not remembering it, just saying it out loud.
“Sure… Rain.” I grinned. “Where we going today?” I asked the group in general.
“My Dad’s home…” Seth mumbled; Seth’s place is out then; none of us are really fond of Seth’s dad.
“I’m fresh outta any kind of food, its Mom’s shopping day…” Cya out too.
“My place it is, then. Rain you need to pick a car, let’s go.” Rain got into Seth’s car I noticed while I hopped onto my bike.  I started it up and manoeuvred out of my parking space, and riding out the parking lot, Cya on my tail and Seth just after her.
I live, not on a farm, but on something of the sort I guess, considering we have horses and enough space to ride them. I live with just my Dad and there’s a stable hand and a house keeper had that live in a small garden cottage on the other side of the grounds from us.
This means I pretty much live by myself. My Dad doesn’t come home much, and hasn’t really since my Mom died. The stable hand [Ty] lived in the house for a while so I wasn’t alone so much, but when I turned 15 I decided I was fine on my own. And so Ty moved back to the cottage, and I bring friends home, or go to them, as much, if not more, than I’m actually alone.
I pulled into the garage and shut the engine off. I got off and went and unlocked the house, deactivated the alarm and opened some of the windows and doors, so that by the time I made my way back into the garage, Seth, Cya and Rain were coming into it.
Rain wolf whistled and eyed the other vehicle. An Audi R8.
“Whose is that?” He asked with heavy emphasis on the ‘that’.
“Mine…” I said in a lazy tone, as if it meant nothing. “It was my 17th birthday present.”
“And that?” He asked, pointing at my bike.
“16th.”
He nodded his head approvingly, his long fringe falling over his eyes.
“Come in, make yourself at home, those two do,” I winked at Cya and Seth, going back inside.
“And why wouldn’t we? We lived here half the time anyway.” Cya was simply being cheeky at this point and I just replied by lifting one eye-brow, and lifting the opposite corner of my mouth.
Seth went and got something out the fridge and took Rain to my room.
“Ooooh… A fine new addition to our group,” Cya said, going into girl mode and jumping on the counter.
“Yeah, and if you want him to stay in our group, you’ll keep your hands off,” I told her, banishing the bag of chips that I’d just got out the pantry at her.
“Awww, come on Ri… I’m not going to eat him,” Cya put on her pleading voice, which got to me with pretty much everything, except guys.
“Cy, I love you to death, but you pick up and drop guys like nothing, you want him in our group, although he already seems to be, then you leave him alone, got it?”
“Yes Mother,” We both laughed and grabbed the chips and drinks and went up to my room, throwing ourselves down on my bed.
I tossed the chips at Seth, Cya a drink each at Rain and Seth.
“So, Rain, where’d you live before this?” Seth asked casually, not letting on that we were all dying of curiosity. Even me, which was definitely something.
“Well, we moved here from DC, but before that we were in Ohio, and before that was San Francisco, and well, I think you get the point.” He told us.
“Hectic, how many places have you lived?” I asked, some curiosity unfortunately slipping through.
“I’ve never really tried to keep track, we just go from one place to another, normally once a year.”
There was silence.
“Who wants to go for a ride?” I broke the uncomfortable silence and changed the subject all in one go.
“Ride? As in… like a horse?” Rain looked a little perplexed.
“No a dragon,” I grinned, “Yeah, a horse. You’ve never ridden a horse before?” He shook his head.
“Well we’re gonna have to change that.” Cya said simply, who grabbed my hand and pulled me all the way outside.

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I Am For Me

I wrote a poem. It just happened. My heart swelled, my brain whirled, my eye-brow twitched. And voile, my entire being was suddenly completely focused on wanting to put words to paper [{ or screen, as I would have it }] and get it onto something more substantial than my thought patterns. What was originally meant as a picture dedication turned into a poem. Well, there you have my friends.

 

Click for full size image.
Image © Jess Swinburne, 8th February 2011

I Am For You
This is for everyone that I love, and that loves me.
This is for all my friends, past and present.
This is for those who have taught me something, or helped me become the person I am, and the person I will be.
This is for anyone who influenced my life positively.
This is for anyone and everyone who guided, nourished or cared for me.
This is for the people who knocked me down and then picked me back up.
This is for anyone who ever smiled at me, winked at me playfully, and cared enough to ask me how I was.
This is for those who helped me when I hurt or let me help them when they hurt.
This is for those who helped me with a problem, or held me while I cried, and let me do the same for them.
This is for all those who made me cry, and in a way, made me stronger too.
This is for everyone who guided me when I was lost or found me in the dark.
This is for anyone who danced with me in the rain and laughed with me in the sun.
This is for the people who inspire me to be a better person, or tried to push me a little further into the light.
This is for those who have shaped and molded me, and taught me how to be myself.
This is for the people who helped me through adversary and ‘loved me gently into being.’
This is for everyone who made me do something I didn’t want to and helped it to become one of my amazing life experiences.
This is for anyone who was a cliché with me, or helped me bash one.
This is for anyone who rocked my socks, and let me rock theirs.
This is for the people I laughed, cried and smiled with.
This is for the people who watched the stars, moons, and clouds with me.
This is for those who came out of the bad with a stronger heart and a better outlook on life, and helped me to do the same.
This is for those who caught me when I jumped and taught me how to fly.
This is for anyone who loved me enough to tell me when I was wrong, and helped me to do right.
This is for everyone who showed me the blessing in the bad, the good that can come from chaos and the sometimes necessary in the calamity of life.
This is for the people who supported me when I was about to fall, and helped me achieve success when I was on the brink of failure.
This is for my first love and my first crush and the person who taught me the real value of ‘firsts’.
This is for the people who deserve to be among the stars and the people who showed me to see my reflection in the clouds.
This is for all the angels in disguise hiding throughout my life, and for those to whom I have been an angel.
This is for the people who encouraged me to stretch and grow my gifts and talents.
This is for those who told me I’m beautiful and made me feel beautiful in my own skin.
This is for the people who hug me tight and spin me ‘round.
This is for anyone who stood at my back while I stared my fears in the face and let me hold their hand while they did the same.
This is for the people who let me sing at the top of my lungs, even though I can’t.
This is for the people who taught me how to love without condition and without restraint.
This is for the people who showed me the colour in the dark and the spectrum in the light.
And above all else, I am for you.
© Jess Swinburne, 9th February 2011